This blog is dedicated to my dearest Krishna...mostly poetry, sometimes through the words of a Gopi, and sometimes, just my own musings...

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Gopi: Staring at the Rain- The Aftermath

Dear Lord,
When the lashing rain stopped, there rained water from my eyes!
How do i appreciate Your greatness, that made You stop the rain?
O Dearest Lover, though i couldn't see You that day, You were kind and wonderful, so much so, to take me to Your place, against all odds, the next morning!

That day, as i stood in front of You, bewildered, and totally swept away, even my poetic rhyme deserted me!

i bestowed this insignificant life of mine at the hands of the Controller of the Universe, and Oh! how well You have taken care!
O dearest Lord, how kind You are that You gave such high value to my mere words??

How will i ever repay You?
How wonderful You are!
And in this very manner, by thus making me speechless in gratitude, You make this seperation even more painful.

You are the Monarch of my Mind!
Surrendered that i am unto You, this heart beats only for You!
Accept my humble offering unto You, and bestow upon me Your kind grace!!
Let me forever be lost in Your love, and forever at Your service.

Yours forever,
i love You!!!

P.S: i searched 4 words for so many days, but finding none suitable to describe the wonder that You just made happen so easily, (perhaps by smiling Your beautiful smile), i chose to fill in this mediocre post. It's not the usual rhyme, but, please, do hear my plea!


  1. A very touching post. Especially liked the rain analogy.

    Some lines in the letter seem to convey that we are ever with Him, while others seem to convey the pangs of separation in words. Beautiful!

    How will i ever repay You?

    What have we to offer to Krishna? Nothing indeed! Everything is His as He is the Supreme Controller of the entire universe. The act of surrendering oneself as a Jivatma itself is just a process of waking up to the reality -- that we are all at His mercy He is the one and only master.

  2. @prahladadasa: Thnx 4 ur beautiful comment.
    //Some lines in the letter seem to convey that we are ever with Him, while others seem to convey the pangs of separation in words.//

    i never realizd it as i wrote.

    But if it is true that 'we are in Him, and He is in us' (as He says in the Bhagavad Gita), then seperation is also a reality, as we can't appreciate it completely!

    "You can't see Him and yet He is always there"..."He is always ruling over us, but we feel seperation"...[two realities in stark contrast]

    Perhaps, it's only He who can make both realities coexist in such a manner.

    Am i praising Him or chiding Him?
    Even when i want to chide Him, i guess, in some odd way, i end up praising Him...

    sry, this comment is turning out to be a case of stupidly misplaced words, and am running around in circles, i guess am a bit distraught now, a bit disappointed...couldn't make it to the temple today!

    Thanks, and Regards,
    In Love With Krishna

  3. Wow, that was amazing! Krishna reciprocates with His devotees' according to the desire that is in their hearts. Clearly, your heart is filled with the desire to perform devotional service! It is so inspiring. This reminds me of how when Krishna was born, and Vasudev carried Him, all the obstacles in his path vanished. You carry Krishna in your heart, and so, all the obstacles in your path vanish! Especially those obstacles on the path to Krishna! :)

  4. Hare Krishna!

    I just HAD to comment again! Yesterday I read a verse from the Bhagavad Gita and I was just thinking about your post now and it reminded me of the verse. Or maybe the opposite happened - that is, I thought about the verse and then remembered this experience of yours. But anyway, it suits this perfectly!!

    "O Arjuna, I give heat, and I withhold and send forth the rain. I am immortality, and I am also death personified. Both spirit and matter are in Me." - Bhagavad Gita, 9:19

    The part about the rain just suits this so perfectly!

  5. @Drainpiper: Thanku so much for posting this here.
    It is amazing how He can bless us, when we realize that we belong to Him.
    i am woefully ignorant of His words in the Bhagavad Gita, yet He blesses me with realization, first by experience, and then by saying : "this is what I always am", by perhaps making you post this.
    Indeed, we are not the purest of devotees (sorry about the plural here, given that you are around my age, i figured our thoughts match on this), nor are we learned, or anything, and so many times, maybe not as accomplished and capable as some others to serve Him.
    Yet, He comes down for us (am not going the Christian way of saying God is up, above; just that He has to come down from His level), knowing that we love Him, and takes His time out to overwhelm His devotees, and leaves us with a smile plastered on our faces...
    He takes care of our lives...
    He adorns our dreams...
    He blesses us, every moment, simply by letting us think of Him...
    He responds to the silliest and most impractical of our requests...
    He creates opportunities for us to serve Him...
    O Krishna! How do we thank you?!
    How do we repay You?!

    Keep us forever at Your feet!
    Bless us to always serve You!
    May pride or ignorance never blind us from seeing You.
    May we not deviate from Your path, give us the heart, and may we find it overflowing with love for You, more so every next moment!!!!!

  6. Haribol!!
    I pray along with you!
    And you are so right. Speaking for myself, I am miles away from being an ideal devotee. But even so, Krishna still cares. And that's what I appreciate so much! I love how every single thing matters. I love how Krishna doesn't forget even a little service that we render, knowingly or unknowingly. One spoon of prasadam is enough to get some special mercy from Him! I just love how every little thing we do, maybe we fast one day, or maybe we worship Ganesha or Shiva, or another god, maybe we help a devotee render service to Krishna... no matter what religious step we take, it ultimately takes us to Krishna. And that makes me so happy to know - that everything matters to Krishna. Of course it's better that we worship Krishna directly, but it's nice to know that for those who don't do so, all is not lost. Krishna has created ways for each and every person to ultimately reach Him, according to our own characteristics and needs. Different religions, different gods, different schools of thought... I cannot grasp the concept of a permanent hell. It just seems strange that God would cast a person into hell for believing in a different religion. That's why this makes perfect sense to me - that all paths ultimately lead to the true God. The only condition is, that those paths must be bona-fide.

  7. Speaking about worshipping Ganesha and Shiva, i find it irksome how some Vaishnavites misinterpret the meaning of not "worshipping" other Gods.
    Krishna Himself asked Vaishnavas to pray to Ganesh before they began praying to Him, for such was His boon to Ganesh.
    The key thing is that Gods are worthy of all our "respect". You just cannot not respect them.
    Perhaps, we have lost the right to ask for specific things, given that we are surrendered to Him.
    But we have to offer our obeisances, from the heart, for that is where our bhakti towards Him springs up from.
    But, for Vaishnavas, though we don't need to, it's not a sin to worship Siva or Ganesha or Kartikeya.
    This is my opinion, i might be wrong.
    Of course, Krishna is above everything, the One to whom we belong, and nothing whatsoever can change that, by His grace.

  8. Omg, so sorry for the late reply! I didn't see this comment..

    I am of the same opinion. Many make it seem like a "sin" but it's not, really. At least not according to me. Like you said, our main focus should be on Krishna, but I don't think it's wrong to worship and respect other gods. Not in the least bit... Shiva himself is known as the greatest Vaishnava. And we, as Vaishnavas, are taught to be the servants of the servants of Krishna, and respect all beings, especially Vaishnavas.

    Srila Prabhupada stressed that we should approach Krishna for everything, so our main focus is Krishna. He also mentioned that if we approach the demigods, we should approach them with regards to Krishna. Like we can approach Ganesha, the Remover of Obstacles, to remove our obstacles in the path of Krishna Consciousness. I personally always pay respects to the demigods, but now that Krishna Consciousness has become my way of life, I turn to Krishna for every need that I may have.

  9. //if we approach the demigods, we should approach them with regards to Krishna.//

    You know, i had this phenomenal experience once.
    i was in a durga mata temple once.
    She is in samayapuram, and is the sister of Sri Ranganathar, whose residing place is one of the prime spots of Sri Vaishnavism, perhaps the most profound.
    It is said that even flower garlands are exchanged between both the temples.
    i was in Trichy (a city in Tamilnadu) with my family, for a different purpose, but badly wanted to have darshan of Ranganathar.
    He knew it was impossible, and so gave me a breathtaking darshan in my dreams, one that was so exhilirating.
    It so happens that i was born in Trichy, though it is not my native place. But, that's the main reason i feel so connected with Ranganathar, and Durga mata in Samayapuram.
    That was around the time when i had made a descision not to ask for anything in prayer, for i thought that would complete my surrender unto Him. Though i have unfortunately broken it with Him some times after that, i hope i haven't lost out on the 'surrender' part of it.
    So, i was in the temple of maa durga, who, especially, in that form, is my mother.
    i said- "forgive me, for people come here asking so many things of You, would i not be a proud daughter of Yours, not asking You anything? i have committed many errors, please forgive me. i ask only one thing of You, and do not know how to put it in a way that does not sound fabricated or proud- Bless me that my idiotic pride never comes between me and Your brother."
    There's a custom in the temple that they drop rock salt in a particular place, as it keeps your skin healthy. As i was bound by my word not to ask for favors, i said- "Bless me to see Your resplendent face, maa, that's all i want. Bless me to see the splendor of Your face."
    i was standing at the entrance, and seeing Maa in Her beautiful form. In my mind, i was repeating my prayer- to help me get to Him. At the entrance, there was a photo of the Goddess with a lot of flowers adorned. As i thus prayed, a whole bunch of flowers fell from the photo onto my hands, which were amazingly open, as i was holding my purse!
    i felt so blessed at that moment of time, truly.
    Tears rolled down my cheeks.
    She had accepted my prayer!
    Maybe she then went to Her brother and chided Him for driving people mad.
    For He HAD driven me mad with the dream-darshan.

  10. Oh my goodness, that was just MARVELLOUS!! Wonderful! Hari Hari bol! These leelas... I would never trade them for the world!! I'm just imagining the entire scene. It must have been exhilarating for you! So truly blessed to have experienced this... Hari bol!