Your Eyes Turned Away!

O Lord!

i am but Your meagre slave,
And, i have no respite You save:
Let me not wither in the wilderness!
Let me not be alone to despair and madness!

Your eyes steal every heart they rest upon:
Then why to rest on me they take so long?
Your powerful finger that lifted the hill:
When will they rest on mine and my mind's void fill?

Whether You hold me close to Your broad chest,
Or leave me lost like a child in a fest-
Whether You by Your smile my senses astound-
Or wring this heart by Your punishing frown:
i have none but You, my Lord!

O Lord who blessed a friend who wanted a handful of rice
To be more than Kubera richer thrice-
O Heartthrob who stole away the Gopis' garments
Will You not steal this slave from Your imposed torments?

i have no voice to fight
Coz i have believed You are always right!
If i be wrong forgive me and take me;
If this is some game, lost to You let me be!

Why?

Lost in this eerie wilderness,
Caught in the worst of mind's duress;
Oh! i am lost in this horrid place my lover-less,
Why don't you come to relieve my stress?

Why will You not talk?
(O My Honey-lipped Lord!)
Why have You turned Your face away
O Dearest! Don't my tears Your heart sway?

Do You think i can manage alone?
Do You think i'll believe You are stone?
Or, are You exasperated by my monotone-
And left me for my sins to atone?

Oh! Even if i must atone, (O Lion-Faced Lord)
How will i possibly survive alone?
i love You, i am surrendered unto You
Never, ever bid me adieu!

If i have been frivolous, forgive me,
If mistakes are mine, have mercy on me;
This heart cannot beat in Your absence-
O! O! Never may i be anywhere but Your presence.

You took away our symbol of love,
And, left me completely bereft now;
All my mind churns out is tears
Calling desperately, that dear PSP! You be near!

Of What Use?

Caught in the web called Life,
Embroiled in the daily strife,
Have i forgotten You, O Beloved!
Oh No! Your causeless mercy on me bestow!

My hands in front of You are folded,
But they are by habit moulded.
My eyes in Your direction stare unswaveringly,
But they are incapable of appreciationg Your beauty unfortunately.

My mouth bears only Thy name,
But, the words are empty all the same;
My feet run to Your temple,
But oh! my heart cannot behold the spectacle!

Of what use are my hands that can't serve You?
Of what use are my eyes that don't cry for You?
Of what use are my words if they don't reach You?
Of what use is my existence if not for You?

Why is this heart so bound,
Wherefrom is this slag newfound?
Have i been too proud, dear Lord?
Or my laziness failed to strike a chord?

Of this mind, You are the Monarch,
Wherever You wish, you have it park'd;
i am maddened by Your silence stark-
O Dearest Lord! Lighten my thoughts dark!

With Your Panchajanya conch,
Send my misgiving away by furlongs;
O Slayer of Demons! Slay this surrendered slave's insincerity,
O Love of My Life! Into Your helm, grant me a re-entry!

Do i have any rights?

When You are always here,
But sometimes, i falter,
Can i still belong to You?

When You are so good,
and i ungrateful-
Would i still have Your presence?

When You are impeccable,
And, yet, i commit mistakes intolerable-
Would You still save me from seperation miserable?

When i forget Your greatness,
And fall back on my promises-
Would You still bless me with Your caresses.

When You are all-encompassing,
And, yet, i commit errors embarrasing-
Would You stay with me, my Lord, all-forgiving?

When the ocean of love suffers a despair-spill,
And, my whole world comes to a standstill:
Would You not the void fill?

When i commit errors in devotion-
Do i still have rights to call myself a devotee?
When my mind is turning out to be full of vice-
Do i have rights to love Thee, to talk things nice?


Maybe i do not have the right to talk to You,
But, other options i have are few-
i have none but surrender unto You!

Forgive me, if You will,
By Your embrace, my holes kindly fill-
And by Your wonderful presence, this little heart You fill.

Krishna...am sorry...and thanks for making me Realize...

Dearest Lord,
What do i say?
i chided You, got angry at You, when none of it was Your fault.
i was angry coz i could not see You.
i was upset as i had lost the privilege of being with You.
But, i forgot, that all this was happening because i love You.
i forgot to tell You, or show You how much You mean to me.

And, then, You made something (i dunno what) clear when i talked with a few devotees.
And then You showed me this wonderful video.



How could i ever think of blaming You, dearest Lover?
These pictures are but signs of Your loving nature!
You are my all, and i am Yours.
i had no right to the dramatic stupidity, and no reason too.
You were, and are, always here, and will always be there.
Am sorry, for being so horrible.
Please forgive me.
Come back, dearest Krishna, and teach me a lesson in love anew.
Maybe this itself was one: to love You without expecting in return.
i am lost here, if You will not come.
You are my Everything, if You abscond, then there is nothing.
Come, come, come....dearest KRISHNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i should have realized when You showed me the guru in my dream...
i should have realized when You saved me...
But no...am stupid.
AM profusely SORRY.
KRISHNA!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am surrendered unto You.
Am at Your discretion.
Whatever You do, o the One i Love, i am Yours, and Yours forever.
Just let me serve You.